dys·func·tion /dɪsˈfʌŋkʃən/ [dis-fuhngk-shuhn]–noun
1. Medicine/Medical . malfunctioning, as of an organ or structure of the body. 2. any malfunctioning part or element: the dysfunctions of the country's economy. 3. Sociology . a consequence of a social practice or behavior pattern that undermines the stability of a social system.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Life...Mine To Conquer

After having several conversations with Boyfriend and Bestie, and reading a very inspirational post by Single Dad Laughing, I have decided to address my parenting issues.

I have to admit that sometimes I become very overwhelmed with being a mother.

I love both of my children dearly and I want to do the best for them.

This want is what becomes crushing to me.

Bestie and Boyfriend have both given me the same advice: that once I recognize the parts of my parenting that I don't like or feel like are lacking, then I should change them.

This makes PERFECT sense. It is easier said than done obviously, but at the same time a completely necessary step in healing that damage that I have done to my parenting-self-esteem.

The eloquence of Single Dad Laughing (homepage of SDL found here) has also inspired me to search more inside myself and see the things in my past that are affecting my ability to parent confidently.

A lot of my parenting has been based on the ideals and goals that I have set out for myself when I first decided to have children. Back when I was just a wee one myself, there were many things that I decided I would or would not do. Mainly because my parents did or did not do these things....and I hated them for it.

So, in my every day life, where I am unable to keep up with the housework, or work up the energy to play blocks for three straight hours, I start to get down on myself.



And I lose sight of the bigger picture.

More importantly, I lose sight of the now.

I am going to take a little of everyone's advice, and I am going to get my life back in order. This little slump that I seem to have hit does not have to last. I know I can be a fantastic mother, and I will prove it one year month day week hour minute at a time.