dys·func·tion /dɪsˈfʌŋkʃən/ [dis-fuhngk-shuhn]–noun
1. Medicine/Medical . malfunctioning, as of an organ or structure of the body. 2. any malfunctioning part or element: the dysfunctions of the country's economy. 3. Sociology . a consequence of a social practice or behavior pattern that undermines the stability of a social system.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Nut Bar

Boyfriend and I went to our local shopping mall last week.

We parked farrrrrrrrr away from the entrance because I have two children and a double stroller, and sometimes it takes a lot of time or space to load and/or unload these children into the car.

After we had finished our shopping we walked back to the car (on the opposite side of the parking lot - remember) and began loading the children in.

I clipped Shake'n'Bake in and walked around the car to unload the stroller. Boyfriend was on the same side of the car as the stroller loading Splat into her carseat.

Someone pulled halfway into the spot next to us.

Next to us.



At the farrrrrrrrrr end of the parking lot....with MANY other empty spaces scattered around...she stuck the nose of her car in, encountered the open door-and-stroller issue, and stopped and idled.

I peeked in the back window to see the status of Boyfriend putting Splat in the carseat, mouthed "Sorry!" and grabbed the stroller which I then collapsed and put away.

This driver then proceeded to be crazy.

She honked and yelled "C'mon! Can't you see I'm trying to park here?! Just close the door!"

To which we just looked at her in disbelief.

Boyfriend finished putting Splat in as I was loading our purchases in around the stroller. (seriously...there were at least another 200 spots available in the parking lot, including one almost directly across from the spot this woman was trying to drive into) After he finished SAFELY BUCKLING THE CHILDREN IN Boyfriend stood up and closed the door, and this crazy B$%# RAN INTO HIM WITH HER CAR!

Then she got out quickly and walked away towards her store.

I don't know if she's not from around here, but in my town you don't F- with people because the majority of the population is crazy and will cut you, but I found it particularily interesting that she walked away from her car...which we were still right next to...and just assumed it would be safe.


Dear Crazy Woman From The Mall:

You know who you are. I don't know why you were in such a bad mood that day. There were plenty of spots available for you to park in if you were in such a rush. Obviously we were busy trying to make sure that the CHILDREN were safely buckled in to the car, and to be honest the entire process only took 3 minutes. If you didn't have a whole 3 minutes to wait maybe you should have parked in another spot...like the one across from the one you were aiming for, which, for the record, was closer to the mall. It was completely inappopriate, and in this town kind of dangerous, to yell at two people who are putting kids in their car. Or people period. We could have had baseball bats, or guns... And then to hit Boyfriend with your car?! Are you out of your mind?! One day Ms. Crazy Woman From The Mall, you will be a giant flaming B$%# to the wrong person and you will get hurt.

Sincerely Yours
Dysfunction





Oh, and P.S., check the paint on your passenger side.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sad to hear boyfriend got car'd
and you got crazy lady'd
but funny to hear crazy lady got paint-pwned

-Jujube Slingshot

dys·func·tion said...

It's just amazing what some people will do...

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