dys·func·tion /dɪsˈfʌŋkʃən/ [dis-fuhngk-shuhn]–noun
1. Medicine/Medical . malfunctioning, as of an organ or structure of the body. 2. any malfunctioning part or element: the dysfunctions of the country's economy. 3. Sociology . a consequence of a social practice or behavior pattern that undermines the stability of a social system.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

My Maternal Pledge

I have written this in response to my last post. If there is anything my mother gave me, it is the desire to be the best parent I can possibly be for my children. If for nothing else, then so they do not feel the same pain that I have felt.

The 10 promises that I make as a mother.

1. Affection will not be hidden in my home. My children will know that they are loved because I will tell them that they are loved. I will hug and kiss my children at least once a day, most days more. My children will know that they are loved because I will show them that they are loved.

2. I will not say “Because!” as an answer. I will always answer my children’s questions because they deserve to know. Without answers they will not learn, without answers from me they will not learn to trust me.

3. I will not humiliate or belittle my children when they make mistakes. Accidents happen and mistakes are made to learn from. Gently.

4. I will read with my children and do everything possible to encourage their love of reading. Reading will open many doors for my children and spending the time to read to them will assure them of my love and presence.

5. I will do my best to instil good eating habits in my children. It is easier to be raised with good eating habits than to try and change poor ones later.

6. I will raise my children with tolerance and acceptance. They will not be blind to differences in people, as that is not a reasonable expectation, but the differences that they see will not influence their opinions of people. Someone may be different from me because they have black skin in the same way that someone would be different from me if they had blond hair. Or a penis. They are only differences in appearance and not worth.

7. I will try to do the ‘little extra’.

8. I will become involved in school and other activities because my children will excel if I am invested.

9. I will try my hardest to become a person that my children can talk to about anything, and come to anytime they need help.

10. Above all else, I will love my children with forgiveness and understanding for the rest of their lives.


jedi starrunner said...

tears in my eyes. this is so sweet.

Anonymous said...

You are so incredible! I know you mean every word of it and will be strong enough to make sure it happens.


dys·func·tion said...

@jedi starrunner: You know my goal in life is to make you cry! :P

@Anonymous (Erin): Thank you! It's so kind of you to say that, it helps to know that people are rooting for me.

blogger103 said...

This is beautiful!!!

One Girl's Story said...

Those are all amazing goals to have as a parent, your list is practically identical to mine, and it sounds like for the same reason as yours.

I know what I went through and felt as a child and I want to give my girls more.

Good luck to you, if you do your best to follow your list, you will be an amazing parent and have amazing kids. And remember, we are not perfect, we will not always be able to do all of those things, we will lose our temper, we will run out of patience, some days we will just give all we can give and it still not be enough, but as long as we try, and we put them first, then we cannot fail

ironman1987 said...

Beautiful words. And promise not to be like my parents... Don't hold on to your kids till their old and grey like me ;)

- jG - said...

"another masterpiece by dys·func·tion" indeed.


dys·func·tion said...

@blogger103 & jG: Thank you! :D

@One Girl's Story: I have heard quite often (after telling my story) that I have learned much of what *not* to do, but (I am hoping you may agree) that any small ray of sunshine was given had an amazing effect. I hope to emulate those rays of sunshine for my children. Times ten thousand or more.

@ironman1987: I don't think I could stand to be like your parents! I want to help my children to spread their wings and fly, not clip their wings and confine them to my nest for all eternity!